Can You Hear Me Now?

This year will mark 20 years since I received my first "car phone" as it was called in those days. Ed gave it to me as a wedding gift. I worked in downtown Detroit and it became an invaluable piece of equipment when my car broke down on the Jeffries Freeway one night, coming home from work.

Last summer, when I was combing through some junk for a garage sale, I came across the antiquated device. You should see the size of this thing. The boys were in disbelief when I showed them what my first "cell" phone looked like. The phone and battery were neatly zipped into a leather case which is larger than a toaster. It reminds me of the radios the soldiers would carry with them during World War II, lugging it from battlefield to battlefield. I envisioned myself shouting "mayday, mayday....my car has broken down on the Jeffries! Send help immediately!"

We sure have become dependent on our mini-communication devices, haven't we? Some more than others. I find it amazing at how oblivious people become when they have a cell phone up to their ear. Most of the time I witness this while I am shopping. For whatever reason, all common sense and scruples go out the window as they talk about their husband, or co-workers, or "supposed" friend. Yikes. Then, as they wander about the display racks or up and down the aisles, they ask the occasional "can you hear me now?" To which I'd love to say "Of course they can hear you now. The whole damn store can hear you now! Did you want everyone to know your a gossipy tart?"

We resisted getting the boys' their own cell phones until they were in middle school. It was at that age when they started becoming more independent and we wanted them to have it more for our peace of mind than theirs. The argument prior to that time had always been "What do you need a cell phone for? Due to your age and limited social life, you're not going to be anywhere that I can't reach you."

Then, a little over a year ago, we added unlimited texting to our plan. Can I just say, OMG! That's "oh my God" for all you unhip nontexters, which is what I was until about a year ago. I used to receive emails with LOL in them constantly and didn't know what the heck it meant. Now, thanks to the barrage of cell phone carrier commercials, I can spew sentences with IDK and BFF in them like no body's business.

I really couldn't understand the need for texting. I tried to explain to the boys that they are with their friends at school for seven hours a day, they each have an e-mail account, and we have a home phone. If you have something to say to someone just say it. Little did I know that e-mail was already considered obsolete with this generation. "No one uses e-mail, mom!" I remember thinking, "they don't, why not?" Perhaps it has something to do with their OPOS (obnoxious parents over shoulder).

And so it began. In December of 2007 I sent my first text! I only texted the boys in the beginning to check on what they were up to and say "hi." I quickly became irritated when I would take great care to type my text with correct spelling and proper grammar and punctuation usage and ask questions only to have Alex reply "k". What the heck! How about a little lovin' for your cool mom, dude? Is "k" all you can say?

As the months wore on, I began to notice a disturbing trend with my kids. They became texting fiends! It was as if their phones became surgically attached to their thumbs. You couldn't even finish saying "good morning" or "good night" before you heard the hum of their vibrating phone.

Statements with exhorbitant amounts of texts came rolling in. Granted, they were unlimited and so it didn't cost more money, but we were astounded. It was as if they were they texting each other one letter at a time and it took 42 texts just to form one sentence. Shortly thereafter, Ed and I staged an intervention and laid down some ground rules.

I truly believe this generation will be lacking in some crucial face-to-face communication skills when they get out into the real world, not to mention survival skills. One time when Alex was grounded from his cell phone, he asked me if he could have it while he drove somewhere. I said "no." He replied "but what if my car breaks down or I have an emergency?" I said "then you get out of the car and walk to a gas station and borrow their telephone like I used to when I was a teenager." But, I guess I don't have too much room to talk. Just twenty short years ago I was running around screaming "mayday, mayday..."